Humor is considered the highest and most mature of all forms of defense mechanisms.

WHY DO YOU LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT?

Defense mechanisms are allegedly "unconscious," illogical, or distorted ways of speaking, acting, and perceiving. The other kinds of psychiatric disorders could be added here as well, but as they are taken seriously they usually are not sources of humor, but rather of ridicule. Humor itself may be used by the psychiatric patient (or client). The Ganser syndrome, or "nonsense syndrome" involves humorous replies in order to escape the seriousness of bad news. For example, the doctor may be called just a "friend." The patient/client, if asked who he or she is may reply, "A famous bullfighter," or give obviously incorrect replies. Humor itself is sometimes a defense mechanism. One may focus on the humorous to avoid the painful. The list of defense mechanisms begins to overlap with the informal logical fallacies to include: blaming, minimizing, diversion, irrelevance, disassociation, incorporation, etc.

Humorous laughter is a sign that something went wrong, that something doesn't fit. It is the false which seems to be true, or the wrong which seems to be right, as it is with rationalization. It may, with such mechanisms as paranoia, be the true which seems false, or the right which seems wrong. Humor is a defense mechanism against what is perceived to be impossible, contradictory, or unacceptable. It comes as a correction of a shock to our reason or expectations. Humor allows us to overcome the impossible and elevate ourselves above it. The comic involves cheerful acceptance and adaptation by an intelligent person. In both humor and schizophrenia there is failure to differentiate between the abstract and the concrete, the figurative and the literal, the relevant and the irrelevant, symbol and object, form and content. Both involve contextual confusion. The difference between humor and defense mechanisms is that with humor one must be aware that there is a contradiction, deviation or mistake. On the other hand, the conscious humor may be used unknowingly for perverse purposes or to relieve frustrations or hostilities. Masha Mishkinsky (1977) sees humor as a "courage mechanism." We supposedly use humor, as we use courage, to modify, reorganize, criticize and depart from the customary, in order to deal better with conflict. In the following account, however, the defense mechanism is not being regarded as pathogenic, but rather therapeutic.

1. Acting out. An example would be to go for a drink as soon as one starts studying; or dating anyone at a bar instead of trying to solve one's marital problems. Wearing tattoos may sometimes be a type of acting out, a way of revolting against the rules of society or purposely doing what one knows others do not accept. Acting out, a type of behavioral humor, is a way of attempting to solve one's problems by irrelevant action, rather than by discussion of the problem itself. It is often self-defeating and may not alter the source of the problem. Suicide and excessive drinking may be regarded as types of acting out. In acting out, a destructive action takes the place of the talking-out of the problem. It is humorous to the outsider because it is such useless behavior and because the actor does not realize its futility. It can also be tragic.

2. Compensation. An incongruous attempt to make up for a fault. A cruel act may incongruously be followed by extra kindness. A weak person may try to act especially strong; a less intelligent person more intelligent, etc. A smoker says, "Sure, I smoke, but I eat strictly health foods."

3. Conversion. A conflict or unresolvable problem is converted to or affects one's body so as to result in physical malfunction or paralysis, e.g. psychic blindness, paralysis of a limb, inability to move (as in the state of shock). Sometimes, as with conversion hysteria, as soon as truth serum is used to eliminate the psychological block, the patient can immediately move again. One may be unable to move when in shock. Thanatomimesis involves pretending to be dead, or at least being motionless, thereby possibly avoiding a predator. We find it humorous for a human, insect, or animal to pretend to be dead, or for a person to be able to move an arm which, a few minutes ago, one could not move.

The goal of life is sex-or its denial.

And I suppose you think I have a sex drive too?

Quiet, I don't want to know.

5. Depersonalization (compare "Personification") A person gradually develops a feeling of unreality, self-estrangement, or multiple personality. Irrational statements and assessments lead to depersonalization.

6. Displacement. This is another term for transference, symbolization, or metaphorization. An object or thought is taken out of its normal context and so displaced. Displacement may refer to the breaking of an association or connection between feeling, and thought. One's desire for a romantic love relationship is displaced to a "romantic" love of cats.

7. Escape. (See "Escape or release humor" listed after defense mechanisms.)

Sei gefühllos. Ein leicht bewegtes Herz ist ein elend Gut auf der wackenden Erde. (Goethe) [Be emotionless. An easily moved heart is a miserable possession in a wavering world.] Jewish humor is often especially characterized as being survival or escape humor. (Ziv 1993:vii)

8. Fixation (See "Stereotype humor" and "Taking literally.") A person has fixed and inflexible ideas. Although this sometimes means fixation at a certain stage of development it is more useful to think of it as one's being captivated by a metaphor, linguistic statement, image, perception, or motor behavior (cf. habit). Behaviorists might refer to fixation as strongly reinforced conditioning. Psychiatric patients are often obsessed with a belief, statement, fear, persecution, etc. Even scientists and researchers in other disciplines are often captivated by or fixated on some theoretical model or metaphor, as Thomas Kuhn (1962) has pointed out in The Structure of Scientific Revolutions. Science is, like other disciplines, taken in by fashion and current trends. Scientists may literally see the world in terms of their limited models in almost the same way as perhaps a schizophrenic sees a schizophrenic world. Supposedly, by means of fixation one has security and a way to cope with and organize an otherwise incoherent accumulation of problems. But if the model fixated on is mystical, unrealistic, or confused, the fixation becomes maladaptive. Fixation may involve perseveration (repeated to an exceptional degree, repetition for no reason of a single phrase or behavior), recurring ideas or tunes, repetition of first reaction learned, verbigeration (the meaningless repetition of words or phrases), compulsion, obsession, echolalia, (repetition of answers in the same words the questioner used).

Ever since she saw "Love Story" she keeps wanting to find her man and die.

A nonparticipant says, "We won the game."

He never held his cigarette like that until he met Helen.

10. Intellectualization (Compare informal logical fallacy of "abstractionism.") Intellectualization involves the use of abstract or metaphysical terms, ambiguous, or overly theoretical terms unrelated to concrete experience. By the use of such language one may avoid facing one's conflicts and problems. Intellectualization is also a kind of rationalization. Thomism is such an intellectualization. By speaking abstractly with others, meaningful communication and personal contact may be avoided. Examples: Does it make any difference? Isn't it all relative, so we should just do what we want. Why move at all? If you keep going in the same direction you just end up in the same place.

11. Introjection. An attitude of the patient toward another is unknowingly changed into an attitude towards oneself. One may fear or hate oneself when it is actually someone else one hates. This may be because they do not want to hate others, or because they learned to blame themselves rather than others.

12. Metaphorization. (See "metaphor humor.") Patients use metaphors to attempt to avoid their problems, an issue, or an argument. They may use metaphor because it gives pleasure and avoids the pain of directness. Examples: Q. Why did you rob the store? A. Well, life's a big apple and I'm nibbling at it. Q. Why were you flirting with a married man? A. I guess I just lost control at the wheel.

13. Projection. The reverse of introjection. One's own qualities are unknowingly attributed to others, especially the negative qualities. For example, a woman who does not eat fish or okra because it is slimy. Unsuccessful people may try to find fault with others in an attempt to deny their lack of success, to show that others have failed also, or to attack a quality in others and so vicariously express a dislike of the quality in oneself. Projection is an attribution to others of that which is subjective. Hallucinations may be thought of as projections of subjective states onto reality. The scientists' models are also theoretical projections imposed on reality, but they are often deliberate projections.

14. Rationalization (Compare "wishful thinking.")

15. Reaction-Formation (Compare "contradiction, compensation," reversal humor) This involves doing or saying the reverse of what one would wish to do or say. In place of expressing hatred one may show extreme kindness, as if to compensate for the desire not to hate. Projection and introjection are also reversals as are many of the defense mechanisms. Negativism involves doing the opposite of what is requested. Reaction-formation may be thought of as the metaphorical mechanism of antithesis or oxymoron. This account expands and redefines the traditional view that reaction-formation is a transformation of one "drive" into its opposite. "Drive," however, is a pseudopsychological term.

16. Regression (Compare "act out," "escape.") Acting as one did in a previous stage of development, such as childhood. One cannot actually ever regress or go back to childhood, but rather merely act like a child in some ways. So actual "regression" is a misnomer. Also, pseudopsychological definitions of regression such as, "The ego attempts to return to an earlier libidinal state," should be avoided. One among many unconscious reasons or assessments involved in regression is to try to be in a previously relatively problem-free, secure and protected state where all of one's needs are taken care of by one's parents. We wish to regain the happiest moments of our lives. Transactional analysis stresses the view that there is the "child" in us. But this view is obscure and seems to be a form of restated Freudianism. Examples: When things get tough, I just put my thumb in my mouth and cry. General, would you stop playing with those toy soldiers? Adult says, "Gimme dat." The military treats a battle as merely a child's game.

17. Repression. Repression is traditionally described as suppression of "ideas" or emotions. This is unacceptable because it presupposes unfounded mentalistic entities. One may be afraid of discussing or facing a traumatic event because one finds it too painful to do so. To repress is to avoid or forget painful experiences, or to be unable to describe them. We tend to repress the fact that we will die. Repression is a way of lying to ourselves without being aware that we are doing so. Examples: I was a perfect child. I never told a lie.

18. Sublimation. (Compare: substitution, synecdoche, connotation, metaphor.) Sublimation is substitution for, and distraction from, a major need or desire, especially, sexual desire. Intellectual and physical distraction may serve as substitutes for wishes, needs and wants. For example: sports, dancing, alcohol, conversation, humor, motion pictures, television, eating, etc. Things merely associated with sexual activity, because socially acceptable, may become desired in themselves, e.g. dancing, flirting, music, etc. Sublimation is a form of metaphorical transference or substitution. Humor also has the function of distracting us from our unfulfilled desires. Examples: When he reads a book, every third line he looks for a woman. I'm not sure if he is lonely, but he writes love poems every day.

19. Superiority. (Name calling, practical joke, ignorance humor, satire, trick, ridicule.) An inhumane mechanism whereby one is made to feel good, often at someone else's expense. We feel good because we see that others are suffering or more ignorant than ourselves. Hobbes' theory of humor is that we laugh because of the sudden glory at the infirmity of others. Plain looking people may feel good at seeing someone even more plain than themselves. Ignorance humor involves laughing at people less intelligent than ourselves. Women, because of their greater sex power, may laugh at men regarding matters of romance. There is also a sudden good feeling at a brilliant discovery, triumph, or success. However, for this to constitute humor the superiority must involve the positive emotion of acceptance. Examples: I'm wonderful. I'm gorgeous. I have so much to give. You are really lucky to have me to support.

20. Symbolization. Symbolization may be a misleading and unnecessary term for association, synecdoche, transference, substitution, metaphor. It should not be used in the sense that some concrete object represents a metaphysical or transcendent entity. An object comes to "stand for," or represent another. But one object cannot descriptively and literally "stand for" another. It is either only stipulated that one object is to represent another or two objects have properties so similar that one suggests the other. Stars do not look like or suggest states, but might be stipulated to represent them on a flag.

In human thinking one thing or statement may similarly come to symbolize another because of stipulation, or similarity of qualities, or associations. Some of the associations are subjective, e.g. two things may be regarded as being alike because we are unfamiliar with either one, even though their qualities are entirely different.

For normal and abnormal thinking, symbolization is a common device. It allows a single image or object to represent a complex situation or series of objects or problems. A house comes to represent what happened in it, e.g. discord and conflict, a death that occurred, a traumatic experience, happiness, etc. This is partly the basis of emblems. Because of such fixed associations one may find one has to move away from the house, or greatly alter assessments.

The specific symbols may be understood by analyzing one's assessments or associations. It is unscientific and harmful to claim there are symbols, without having concrete evidence in terms of associations and assessments present. Freud commits this error in seeing every room as a womb, and every object or statement as a symbol of a childhood or traumatic experience. This turns symbol into conceit or farfetched metaphor and commits the fallacy of taking one's metaphors literally. Also, symbols cannot represent metaphysical or transcendent entities. They cannot represent more than we can concretely know. Examples: Look at those chewed erasers!-We know what Freud would say about that: sexual frustration. The symbol for the spirit is ¿, therefore the spirit exists.

21. Transference. (Context deviation, connotation, substitution, metaphor) "Transference" is the translation of the Greek word for metaphor. All kinds of transferences are possible between object, word, statement, thought, behavior, people, problems, emotions, etc. One's problem may be transferred from a cognitive impasse to a physical symptom such as colitis, ulcer, paralysis, etc. An emotion toward one person may be transferred to another object or person. Transference sometimes refers to the attachment a patient begins to feel toward the therapist.

The notion of transfer may be further clarified by relating it to the types of metaphorical transfers and types. Transference relates to learned associations, stimulus generalization, or conditioning. Example: I would only date someone who likes cats.

22. Wish Fulfillment. This is the simple matter of taking a wish and claiming or believing that it is true or will be fulfilled no matter how unlikely it is. Examples: I will be very rich some day. I'm going to be the next president. I'm going on a diet. I'll definitely stop smoking by next week. I'm beautiful. I will live forever.

"Well, then," the Cat went on, "you see, a dog growls when it's angry, and wags its tail when it's pleased. Now, I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore, I'm mad" (Carroll Alice. 1960:63-64)

Humor in literature is a departure from a recognized norm viewed by the author with detachment and playfulness. (Louis Hasley in Pratt 1993:111)

Dziemidok (1993:61) argues that all theories of humor reduce to the acceptable deviation from the norm. We notice deviations from what is familiar to us. If someone deviates, we even say they are mad or crazy. Suppose Brer Rabbit were to start meowing and acting like a cat. It would be strange. It would be humorous depending upon how we take it. Some kinds of deviations which produce humor are: Deviation from: desires, the familiar, grammar, the ideal, the practical, pronunciation, purpose, rules or standards, the usual including obvious lie, unexpected honesty, and even deviation from humor itself.

Viktor Shklovsky (1966:50ff.; 1919, in MB:261) presented his concept of ostranenie, (Russian) defamiliarization or estranging of a certain word in a context by its becoming divorced from the context. The German, Verfremdung, refers to an alienation effect or placing something in a foreign category. The ordinary is thus made to seem mysterious so that we notice what we habitually ignored. He regards it as an omnipresent principle of imaginative literature. "Strange-making" is also the central technique of a number of the French structuralists, such as Derrida.

Putting this on the everyday level, deviating from the ideal means deviating from the best one can be or have. It is the humor produced by something being other than it should be, taken in a nonserious sense. It is tea that tastes like dishwater and hamburgers which are like cardboard. It is striving to be a medical doctor, but ending up selling hot dogs. Taken negatively, deviation from the ideal leads to inferiority assessment-feelings or anger. Deviation from the ideal is a kind of fault. It is also a fault and laughable for one to expect perfection, or to expect the ideal to be achieved absolutely and always. Almost by definition, the ideal cannot be reached. This commits the fallacy of a false demand for perfection, such as expressed in:" Everyone must be as expert as I am," or "I must never make a mistake."

Few scholars...have worked on the linguistic aspects of the comic mode. (Delia Chiaro 1992:1)

Q. How do you tell a Tory? A. You must add an "s" at the beginning.

All the jurors were writing down "Stupid things!" on their slates, and she could even make out that one of them didn't know how to spell "stupid." (Carroll 1960:102) Translation from foreign languages is often humorous, such as the following: "Pepsi comes Alive" was translated into Chinese and unintentionally read "Pepsi brings your ancestors back from the dead." Elevator sign in foreign country read: Please leave your values at the front desk." In Japan a room sign read: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid. Delivery womb (also substitution).

1. Deviation from Grammar (Ambiguity, context deviation, deviations, defense mechanisms, fallacy of accent, metaphor, misclassification, substitution, wrong use)

"Why do we feel a grammatical joke to be deep? (And that is what the depth of [metaphysics] is." (Wittgenstein 1968:#111)

Grammar may be purposely deviated from, e.g. nouns used as verbs, punctuation omitted or misused, etc. As discussed earlier, our language largely constitutes reality. The Whorf-Sapir Hypothesis suggests this, as well as does Wittgenstein's work in ordinary-language philosophy. A whole philosophy is contained in every part of speech and drop of grammar. Grammatical deviation humor explores the limitations and possibilities of language. Poetry, philosophy and science come together here. All essentially involve clarifications of language. Here, all we have to do is not know enough grammar, have poor punctuation, spell badly, and misuse language. For this we may consult the expertise of young children and students. It is to break grammatical rules. Goldstein (1990:39) even argues that the rules of language are often only realized or identified when they are deviated from by means of humor.

Now, we have been translating into good English what Uncle Remus said. What he actually said about the laughing-place was:

"Brer Rabbit show Brer Fox de place, an' den tell 'im dat de game is fer ter run full tilt thoo de vines an' bushes, an' den run back, an' thoo um ag'in an' back, an' he say he'd bet a plug er terbacker 'g'in a ginger cake dat by de time Brer Fox done dis he'd be dat tickled dat he can't stan' up fer laughin.'" (Harris 1972:69)

2. Deviation from Style.

One of the most distinctive aspects of any person's style is the use of humor. (Tannen 1984:130)

The following is from a handwritten letter from a lecturer of English in Basra, Iraq:

Dear Sirs.

[The tragicomic irony of this extremely courteous style is that it was after the Gulf war in which America had just annihilated 150,000 (now over a million) of their people, they faced mass starvation, and he was asking for a book on communication from a people for whom communication had almost totally and fatally broken down.]

The following two vignettes give an example of a flavor of the French by means of humorous style.

What do you expect?

That I will have my money

go up the chimney keeping the room

warm just in case you should decide

to come today? Do you not understand

that I cannot be bothered? I have

suffered revolutionary shocks.

(His lips curl as if to say "O")

Ah, non, our shops are like cats' eyes,

they open and close as they wish.

We fight for beauty.

Non, You cannot have a heated room.

That would be in bad taste. It is 10 p.m.

- Yes, but do you have perhaps another room?

-Yes, but I am not going to give it to you.

-May I ask why not? We will gladly pay

the full day.

-That does not matter. This is no hour

to be getting a room. It is worse than a crime; it is an erreur.

-Well, then, as we are quite hungry,

perhaps we could be served

in the restaurant. We see that it is still open.

-One could, one could. But which one? I do not even know your name. Do you think we package le rosbif with machines? Ah, non.

When we cut a piece of meat we must discuss...

for whom is it...the father...

the sister...the mother...?

And we must know where they are from.

-But our friends ate here yesterday

and the meat was tough.

-The meat...the meat...is fresh, Monsieur, and for this reason it may seem a little less than tender.

-And the coffee was bad.

-Of course, it was. Stupide!

We are known for our wines.

What is good, we grow. French coffee is almost never any good. Monsieur, we have our pride!

Warren Shibles

I have been thinking to write, turning ideas, wondering if I understand well, if I project my fantasies on you, hesitating, deciding not to decide, and not doing anything. Do I really wish to tell you about my "thoughts," "emotions," "feelings" - and there is no real border between all these - or if I want to just "drop it all" because "all" has no use? That "all," that "rest of the world," where can it be met? Is the feeling too wide for me?

It is not so easy to write, so I am happy when it is behind me. I must drink coffee, aperitifs, and eat many biscuits to put some order to my mind to write. And that is what I call being vicious. Next time I will be in a civilized place, i.e. le Quartier latin, I will look for "The laugh of Medusa," to read.

The more I tell about myself, the more I feel linked to the one who possesses some knowledge about me. Just now I am ink. I let my pen write by itself. Do you know of me? Perhaps I am a small girl in a woman's body. If you ask me to define "woman," I don't know. I am not a dictionary. Is this writing male or female? Make a test. What do you feel as a man when you begin to write? What before? When you put ink to the page? When you pull the paper out of the typewriter? When you say, "It is done"? I do feel a kind of deep calmness of the ultimate punctuation of a letter.

To understand what people (tout le monde) say, even if "understanding" is as meaningless as "meaning," I read a romance this morning. It made me quite confused, hesitant in front of it. It touched quite a number of points-sensibles, soft points in my anti-bullet jacket I have built up. I wonder if others have such jackets too? Then what can you do with my thoughts? This is my first thought: There is no interest in them. Second thought: Would you be interested in me? Third thought: impossible! Sometimes I thought some people were, but I had to admit later that their interest was as deep as a slice of bread.

I see we arrive to speak of friendship. I will try to remember the theories I built when I was younger. I have not forgotten about trying to answer my childhood questions. In primary school I hated the number 49, but loved 42. I once wrote: 7 x 7 = 42 and the teacher was not happy. I did not follow the rules. I am perhaps too enthusiastic about a "friend." I shiver sometimes when I think of this word. So I end up giving everything to the wastebasket. But not now, pas du tout! I will keep you. I even think to perhaps be on vacation with "you." Who knows? Where? I have no favorite place, only favorite persons. A place with sunshine near the sea? Does the scenery matter? Is it inside us? J would like to hear your dreams too. I wish to be clear. But I like things fuzzy, blurry, also. Will you come?

Do I push you to react, make la provocation? It is a French sport. So I have to say…do I go too far? Perhaps you have already a man, your priorities and pretty possessions - your rules. I don't know if I like rules or not. They have given me some trouble for some time. I could say I hate any kind of rule that I did not make, but that would not be quite exact.

I could also say that I love someone else trying to impose rules on me: it is a proof of interest. That would also not be quite exact. Suppose you say what is "propre." "Yes, I have a man, but we can still be friends." You could also say friendship is more important than sex. I persist in not understanding you. Good, so we cannot play with friendship because it is too important, but we can play with sex. What does it matter? Monsieur, if we cannot be friends, I will have to be content to just sleep with you.

Am I bad? I would be quite glad if someone explained something about "good" and "bad" to me, because I do not well understand such words. I know a good wine, a good table, and good sunshine and bonjour. What else? What if we were to meet, and what if I were not as "good" as my writing-could not surpass myself?

"I am my words." How far these words can echo. "The empty room echoed." Who is the empty room? For a long time I maintained that if it cannot be said, it does not exist. Even sex had to be commented on to be really interesting. Well, little by little I grew silent. Since a few weeks I talk silently to this paper. But, not now. Oh, yes, the style is the person. (Le style c'est la personne.) Have I said this already? It is the way I am. "Good?" So I do have rules: I behave - grammatically. I bathe myself in words. And at the same time I am so happy when I have the feeling that I can behave simply, just be spontaneous (not to say, "naturelle"), say what I please to you in just that precise moment when I speak. Do you see that my arms are held open for you-like thighs.

Warren Shibles

Colloquial style is often humorous and is rich in value laden terms. The following are examples of colloquial student speech from Bern, Switzerland, which were published by D. Gruner. (1980, my translation)

a. The Valuation of Dialects

Typically, whatever is unlike one's own pronunciation is going to sound to some degree strange or weird even though it may be regarded as having more prestige. We often speak our own dialect as well as the standard, just as the Swiss-German learn a dialect at home and then later in school are required to learn the standard German, Schriftsprache. The standard for Swiss-German is actually a foreign language to the Swiss. They typically report that the Schriftsprache sounds "wooden."

A change of perspective is required in art appreciation allowing us to appreciate in as many ways as possible. Similarly, we can come to value and esteem each dialect and not regard them as intrinsically inferior, any more than one language is inferior to another. We only have our own preferences. We may prefer German over Spanish, or East Indian English over American pronunciation. Cockney is poor RP, but RP is poor Cockney.

Rather, Cockney can be seen as a beautiful and interesting orchestration of sounds. There is great and innovative verbal music to be heard at Petticoat Lane and the markets throughout England, some of which I have myself, taped, transcribed and enjoyed.

Many, if not most, feel inferior because they speak dialect rather than the standard language. The following statements reflect the devaluation of dialect: "Ridicule of the old people by school children is not uncommon…The children find these errors [e.g. dir for dich] very amusing and heartwarming." Dialect connotes "country bumpkin" among the parents. On a Berlin dialect: "A mixture of wit and humor…self-assertive aggressiveness and badmouthed behavior." The Westfalian dialect is said to be "simple" and "coarse." (Deutsche Dialekte 1979:81) "Danish has…a pronunciation which positively lends itself to comedy." (Walshe 1965:13) Andersson & Trudgill (1990:167), on the other hand state: "It will be very important…for local traditional and nonstandard dialects to be seen as objects of interest and value rather than ridicule, and the usage of local speech forms should never be actively discouraged." They speak of the necessity of having the "freedom from condemnation of nonstandard dialects." (80)

The public often thinks of a dialect as a source of colloquial and vulgar language, and sees dialect as a form of amusement, rather than as a language to be proud of. In Germany, where one has dialect in the media or theater, one expects to hear something humorous. In the bookstores, dialect is often classified under "humor." In England and Germany, in place of humor books are found vulgar and abusive language dialect dictionaries. Such dictionaries tend to devaluate dialects. One swears in dialect. But it may be noted that one can be vulgar and swear in standard German or standard English as well.

BROTHER RABBIT'S LAUGHING PLACE.

Pronunciations may involve, among other things, the following. "You've had tee many martoonis." British Snail for British Rail. "I'm afraid I'm going to put you under mouse arrest."

1. Cognates. 1. German ist "is" and ißt "eats" are pronounced the same (i.e. are homophones) and so can generate puns. Example: Wer ist, ißt; wer ißt, ist. ("Who is, eats, who eats is," but the German form shows it better because the same pronunciation is given for both "is" and "eats.") 2. A New Zealand place name of Scandinavian origin, Snefjellnes, has become Snufflenose. 3. In popular French, /a/ becomes /æ/ (as in English apple), thus French péri "perished" and Paris are both pronounced in the same way, making a sinking pun possible suggesting that "Paris perished." [See Boch (1988) for false analogies and cognates between French and Italian.] 4. German geil in Vienna means "rich," but in Berlin means "lustful." 5. Spanish papa means both "potato" and "Pope." 6. French bière means both "beer" and "coffin" and are pronounced similarly. 7. The Japanese word for "lion" is raion , which rhymes with the English name "Ryan." 8. An East Frisian complained [in a typed letter] to a shop about his typewriter: "Dei letztne Buchstabne sidn immre vertauscth!" (English translation: "Teh lats lettesr aer alwasy reversde.")

2. Pronunciation deviation from one's own language (dialect, colloquial, idiolect)

At the phonological level there is humor involving homophone (similar sounding words), alliteration, voice quality clash, word boundary sound shifts, features of rhymes, etc. (cf. Alexander 1997)

What is the difference between a girder and a joist? Goethe wrote Faust, and Joyce wrote Finnegan's Wake.

It is not bad coffee considering that it was ground this morning.

Hare today, goon tomorrow.

asterisk = ass to kiss.

3. Other Language Comparisons. 1. Scottish pride is pronounced like English "prude," about like English "a boot," and town is like "tune." Example: Scot: "What's that about?" English reply: "Yes, it is a boot, but you have to buy both boots." 2. Cantonese "very good" is like English "ho! ho!" 3. Because the Northumbrian dialect of English has a uvular r, it sounds as if the English r is spoken with the French or German uvular r. The result sounds humorous to an English speaker. 4. The Hausa word for "cream" sounds like English "no, no." Irish Gaelic bláthach "buttermilk" sounds like an exclamation of disgust to an English speaker, thereby connoting a dislike for buttermilk. 6. It is said that the Spanish are likely to pronounce English sink for think, chopping for shopping, choke for joke, sheep for cheap, sip for zip, jail for Yale. (Nash 1977:100-101) 7. The Ga (of Ghana) pronunciation for "duck" doh koh doh koh sounds like English ducko ducko. 8. Collins & Mees (1981:167) report that the insertion of the schwa "uh" sound is used for comical effect in Dutch, e.g. helpen ("help") = "hell.uh.puh." 9. French téléphone is pronounced as the English "tele-fun." 10. British (and parts of New England) drop the r and h, and India English speakers use a distinct back retroflex r, making the pronunciation seem amusing to standard American English speakers.

Spelling Errors. A class of U.S. Military Reserves I taught gave the following misspellings: seams for seems, deterants for deterrents, obiedeance for obedience, pease for peace, are for our, write and wrong for right and wrong, aginst for against, affraid for afraid, ect. for etc., sujest for suggest, nigitive for negative, theorey for theory, manegment for management, synamims for synonyms.

4. Onomatopoeia. The best examples of this are to be found in poetry. Several linguistic examples are: 1. Danish "lamb" lam sounds like the bleat of a lamb. 2. The Chinese word for "bus" sounds amusingly like a steam engine, or like English "gung gung chee."

Ceceo may be thought to be strange to seseo speakers and vice versa. Obaid (1973) found that phonologists, among others, typically fail to properly describe ceceo and seseo; that the terms are not used as consistently as thought, but rather quite chaotically. He characterizes this by a humorous deliberate cross spelling of the terms as follows: "Ceseo* or seceo,* whichever you prefer. [* means purposive humorous misspelling.] It is an absolutely chaotic way of mixing up the sounds of /s/ and /th/ ...in whichever form it strikes the fancy of the speaker first." (Obaid 1973:63) In this regard, one Spanish speaker in his usual way pronounced the name of his town six times, but never the same way twice in succession! (Obaid 1973:63)

What is a Jewish rabbit called? A Rabbi.

6. Rhyme (Deviation from usual conversation/prose)

I never take time to make words rhyme.

In order to make words rhyme, verse coerces us to put surprising words together, forces the creation of metaphor. An example of an insight rhyme is: Miracles grow on what we don't know. Miracles are, by definition, based on ignorance, not a special form of evidence. If we do not know how something works, we say that it is a miracle, and believe that it is evidence for a prevalently believed in supernatural power. A simple rhyme can begin to dispel the myth. For another example see the poem "Religious Doggerel" in the chapter on insight humor about religion. Anti-rhyme humor is illustrated by: Mary ate cake and Mary ate jelly. Mary went home with a pain in her-head. Snail Mail for regular mail. "Amphigory" is nonsense writing or verse, with a semblance of sense. For satirical verses about religion, see the philosopher Richard Aquila (1981). Jonathan Swift wrote: "What Humor is, not all the tribe / Of Logick-mongers can describe," and "'Tis never by invention got, Men have it when they know it not." "When you look in a mirror, it is not yourself you see, but symmetry." (Alexander 1977:22)

One purpose, however, of such activities is social interaction. It must, however, be accepted and enjoyable to constitute humor. Additionally, acceptable deviation from the practical can produce enjoyment and humor. "Today, I will sort of follow these rules: Do nothing useful, concentrate on the useless, abandon all ideas which work, avoid all practical activities, say only that which is trivial, and follow belief systems which are pointless. In short, do what people usually do."

In one sense, purposelessness defines "fun." "Fun" is enjoyment rather than work. No goal or definite intention is required except that of enjoyment. "Fun" is also an attitude suggesting ability not to be serious or overly goal oriented. Sensitivity training allows one to stop long enough from goal oriented behavior to appreciate the diverse perceptions and perspectives of things surrounding one which before went unnoticed because they were discounted as nonpurposive. Our perception is colored by its selectivity toward narrow goals. We see a bus only as an object to bring us to work, not as an interesting, object in itself. We become an appendage to the typewriter, computer, or telephone. But when we deviate from purpose the world changes color, we see different worlds. The computer becomes a toy. The screen is made to show goldfish. Deviation from purpose and from our habits produces insight humor and expands our ability to experience. We deviate from purpose to stop to enjoy. Examples: Youth's letter to the Library of Congress: "I would appreciate it very much if you could send me anything about anything." (Gerler 1972) Kant: Art is "purposiveness without purpose." Take a bus without looking where it is going. Put a window in the middle of a field and look out through it. See how far you can spit. Take a different, longer route to work. Spontaneously bring a friend a gift as if it were a special holiday.

Rule: Put i before e except after c. For example in the word "conceit." But note the exception in the spelling of the word "weird." Words such as "mischief," "naughty," and "escapade," suggest rule breaking, or doing what one should not do. The rules violated may be social rules, such as, eating with only a knife or with one's fingers. In India and some other countries, however, one is often expected to eat with one's fingers. To misspell a word is to violate a rule. To create this kind of humor we need only deviate or break any kind of rule in a harmless way. If breaking rules is cruel and unintelligent, it will not be seen as humorous. Sometimes the rule is cruel or militant and should be broken.

"'I wonder, now, what the Rules of Battle are,' Alice said to herself....'One rule seems to be, that if one knight hits the other, he knocks him off his horse, and if he misses, he tumbles off himself....Another Rule of Battle...seemed to be that they always fell on their heads.'" (Carroll TLG 1960:204)

"'But 'glory' doesn't mean 'a nice knock-down argument,' Alice objected. 'When I use a word,' Humpty Dumpty said, in rather a scornful tone, 'it means just what I choose it to mean neither more nor less.'" (Carroll TLG 1960:186)

"Can I say 'bububu' and mean, 'If it doesn't rain I shall go for a walk?'" (Wittgenstein 1968:18)

The following prose relates to the rules and instructions people give when asked for directions.

The "way" was not so easy to find. It was not only the fog that was the problem. In foreign countries, as well as my own, I find that instructions are themselves the foreign language. It does not matter how fluent one s the translation can never be made. I think it has something to so with the unbridgeable gap between the ideal and the real. I admit that I think that north is a relative, not an absolute value. I have been sent to addresses which no longer exist, or whose street name is now incomprehensible Gaelic, or houses with no number on them. I have been given street addresses, but in the wrong city. When one genuinely understands what giving directions and instructions and instructions is really about, one understands the road map of the mind.

I now use the schizophrenic advice: If you can go wrong, you will go wrong. The first right you take is really a cow path and not the paved road you expected. It is especially ironic when they begin, as they usually do with, "It's simple, you just...and then...at the light...and then...O.K.? Can't miss it." Well, I did miss it. I saw the church and the chickens and even the street sign, but no number 5/2. And what kind of numbers were these anyway? Perhaps 5/2 = 21/2? I have always enjoyed houses numbered 1/2. In trying to find such houses you feel almost there, but not quite. At first I saw some very old stone and board and mortar houses-mediaeval looking and very interesting. The address did not apply to any of these or other houses on the street. My first clue was the parking lot. There must be more than cows here. I parked in someone's private stall (car stall) and then noticed that behind the ring of mediaeval houses was an inner ring of recently built houses-but "house" is not the correct word: the roofs were all especially radically steep and there were small balconies and roof gardens giving the appearance of a magical towered town. After reading all the wrong house numbers, I found 5/2. I had only to ring-but which buzzer? One had the professor's name and a man's name, but she was single; and the mailbox had another confusion of names-but, in any case, I could not ring the mailbox. In cases such as this I usual just ring one buzzer after the other from to bottom. It is a small community and they will all soon know that a stranger is here anyway. One could see their curtains move. I sometimes feel that it is right to announce myself by taking a bow in the empty courtyard.

The buzzer unlocked the door and I quickly pushed it open before it locked again. I knew one had to be quick-I had problems with that once when I visited a prison. One can tell about the freedom of a place by the number of keys one has to carry. Here there was a key for the outside door, the apartment door, basement door, garage door, mailbox, car, bicycle lock, etc. "Gay and carefree" were not words which crossed my mind at this time. I have even been given keys to houses only to find myself between two locked metal doors with no key among them which fits.

Now, I have been in several German houses and am quite aware that one does not there just enter a pleasant and comfortable home where one can enjoy company and the pleasures of relaxation. It is rather like entering a book of rules or even a law book. It is a book that might be entitled, The Rules of the House.

We may start with the kitchen. The basic rule is that everything must in every way be perfect. Being very considerate I tried as a houseguest to do my part in washing dishes. I had already known some useful rules from my own experience, such as: self-cleaning pans do not really clean themselves. I also learned that the dishes are always to be washed, but the coffeepot, never. I had already also learned that once seated at the table one is never to get up to get something needed. One's feet must be as if glued to the floor. And, of course, the eternal rule: never touch objects with jam on your fingers.

Normally, I would at home wash dishes and let them air dry, then put them away. I soon found out about the rule that silverware must be dried by a certain hand towel or spots would appear on the silverware. The question then arose as to how long such knives and forks could lie around before spots would appear? Would they appear even as one used them? How long should they be left in the sink? Well, after the meal I would try to wash immediately. However, one morning she came into my study with a look of daggers and pointing to a spot on a knife. Well, I had tried. The rule must have gotten away from me somehow. Was it really a knife that I myself had washed? Could I really stay in a place where rules and spots are more important than people? "Are you sure that is one I washed?" I asked humbly. "Perhaps that is not my spot." I then checked all of the silverware and found many spots. They could not all have been due to my washing because I was only recently a guest and had only used several knives and forks. The rule seemed to be that if she saw a spot anywhere, it must be due to the quest. I mentioned that and further asked about how long the used silverware can lie around. "Not long," she replied, "but I put it totally underwater if it is not washed immediately." The additional rules became unclear and I was soon obliged to follow rules I had no way of knowing about in advance. I thought I would just put all the dishes underwater and let her do them in her own way.

Then, upon her return late one night, her first comment was, "Oh, I see you have not done the dishes." "Well, I'm not very good at it," I ventured, "so I decided not to do them anymore." Although she had mentioned it cheerfully, here is a place where one can sense a certain moral duty, as if it pressed in from the atmosphere itself. A while later when she headed toward her study she said, "Oh, by the way, I'll do the dishes." But, I wondered why if one wants perfect silverware without spots, one would buy silverware which is spot-prone. Why would one choose to be a slave to one's own tools instead of the other way around? I realize that I will never have an answer so I will discuss the sink.

The sink. It seems so clear and familiar. We wash things in the sink, and then the water flows out without going all over the floor. It is quite simple. The sink is stainless steel. Beside it is an inserted chopping block. Now, the rule is that no water can touch the chopping block or it too will make a water spot. But water is bound to regularly fall on this block, so it must be immediately dried. Nor is the chopping block used to chop on. Another chopping block is placed on this chopping block for that purpose. In short, the inset chopping block cannot be used-has no purpose except to have one never use it and never get it wet. It is an antichopping block. It is a chopping block in one sense only: if you break the rules, you get chopped.

Now, it seems the stainless steel sink also produces water spots every time water is left on it. I once noticed this when the professor returned before midnight, took a towel and began vigorously removing the water spots. The words "chromium-slave" came to my mind, but when she was done I also noticed the great feeling of satisfaction that seemed to come over her when she was finished. I thought that perhaps having such a sink was worth it for her. How else would she have that kind of enjoyment?

Now, I admit that I have an extreme pragmatic bent and have been known, for example, to dispose of large piles of office work in record time. When this valuable ability was turned to the washing of dishes I admit I must have tested the aesthetic limit a bit. I was first aware of this when she strode up to me and thrust in my face the underside of a saucer which looked brown as if stained by coffee: "Don't you wash the bottom of dishes?" she asked. I replied defensively, "Are you sure that is one I washed?" I was though quite sure it was mine. Who eats off of the bottom of plates anyway? I, however, got my revenge when we had breakfast together. I put together cups and saucers which did not match. I also have the defense that dishes are washed by the most poisonous substances in the world-so toxic that from now on dishes should be washed without soap. I am, of course, still worried about the water. I have thought of just using my Swiss knife with its collapsible spoon and fork and avoiding the kitchen entirely.

To continue with the teutonic tradition, or fun in the kitchen, I will turn my attention to the refrigerator. It is, of course, to be expected that it is neat. There are plastic trays for everything including eggs. Triple trays sort meat from cheese and all bottles are in straight rows. The rule is: If there are two or more objects they must be lined up. I learned about this rule after watching her line up the remaining crumbs on her plate.

One glance could tell one that the professor was a rational person who led an exemplary life. I thought of the phrase, Alles in Ordnung ("Everything in order, or O.K."). Unfortunately, I took a second glance. It was required because as a guest I had to know what I was allowed to use and what I wanted to use. Surely, I could use the jam if I used a clean spoon. At home, of course, few bread crumbs in the jam wouldn't hurt anything and may even improve the jam, or one could even scoop out a dab with a bent forefinger. When I opened the top of the Waldpreiselbeeren, however, there was nothing to see but mould. I put the jar back into the neat row, then tried the next jars. More mould. It was summer 1999 when I checked the dates on the jars. But on these jars were the dates: June 1997, and May 1996. Vintage. I moved to the salad dressings: Curry sauce, February 1998; Mayonnaise, April 1997. At this time my curiosity arose about the single remaining egg. I remember the professor's words: "I like to keep at least one egg in the house." I gently lifted it out of the special plastic egg container only to find that it was a lot lighter than eggs usually are. What kind of egg was it? I put it on the counter. It did not lie on its side as a normal egg would, but on stood on one end. Then I knew. It must have been over a year or two old. It was an artifact. With permission, I was later allowed to open the egg. The white was completely dried out and the yolk was at one end dried to a deep yellow. In its own way it was a perfect egg. Since then I have developed the practice of writing a date on each egg. In this way, I have come to realize that I also eat fewer eggs than I intend to. In defense of the professor I do wish to say that she has a special needle egg puncher one must use to prevent eggs from cracking should one decide to boil them.

In contrast, it is the strict policy to eat vegetables only the same day they are purchased. And contents of partially filled cartons or jars must be consumed, whether one is hungry or not, in order to dispose of the container. There must be order.

The stove. The stove has the most modern, flat surface and it is quite nice looking. But everything has a price. There are white circles around each burner to indicate the heated area. In this kitchen, however, the circles have become rules: no pan larger or smaller than these circles goes on the burner. I am not yet instructed as to whether after I remove the pan from a large burner I can temporarily rest it on a small burner. So far, I seem to have a relative amount of freedom in this matter, although I would not go so far as to include it in the category of the joy of cooking.

The real problem lies somewhere else. What if, as always happens, something spills on the cooktop. This is where the real danger lies. Anything at all seems to form some kind of amalgamation when it even comes close to the cooktop-and that includes water. Should this unacceptable event occur it would require a great amount of scrubbing to remove. The scrubbing must, however, be firm yet gentle, for if it is not, the expensive countertop might be permanently scratched. However, before it is scrubbed the burner must be completely cool. One reason is that otherwise the rubber sponge would melt. I had once thought I would like to have such a beautiful flat cooktop. Now I think it is like a cat in some ways. You obtain it for your pleasure and end up being its servant. Now, in most places, doing dishes (including cleaning the stove) is more or less a chore. Here, you can perhaps see why if one is eventually allowed to do it, it is an honor.

On some of the kitchen shelves the tea is kept. It is kept in tins acquired in England. Each one is colorful and has advertisements on it: Ocean Queen Tea, Manning Cough Drops, McDinwoodies Boiled Sweets; one from America in the shape of a stage coach with wheels-in the coach is pictured a man shot by arrows with his six-shooter hanging limply by his trigger finger. Now in these containers are not cough drops or boiled sweets, but rather tea. I am not sure what kind of tea because most are not labeled. I had thought that tea must be relatively fresh, but around each can was dust which had become part of the shelf itself. If a can is removed one sees the white, clean, original shelf where the can was. This may be an indication of how old the tea was. I wonder if some of the tea came originally with the cans. That could make it around the 19th century. In any case, the metal tea ball never closes and so the kettle becomes filled with loose tea. Although I have now repaired it and bought a larger tea ball, I noticed also that the professor's favorite teapot is cracked. On the appropriate occasion I casually brought it to her attention and upon receiving such information she replied, "Well, I understand that gradually the tea will block the crack."

When the tea was brewed, the used hot tea leaves were to go into the plastic coffee filter container-in fact, all moist organic and rotting waste went there. It dripped dry so it could be safely put into the proper garbage container. I usually like German coffee, but seemed to always detect a strange flavor of vegetable whenever I drank it there-and it never seemed to be quite the same flavor from one time to the next. In any case, the organic garbage is properly kept dry, the proper garbage is separate, and the plastic and metal is put in yet another container. One took the mere single garbage concept to the new upscale garbage classifications of three, four, five, and as I counted, seven classifications of garbage. This progress has led to what we might well call "perfect rubbish."

There is another rather large object in the kitchen which should be mentioned: a washer. Not a dishwasher, but a clothes washer. It fits nicely under one of the counters. When it is in full operation, however, it vibrates and as it does so it moves forward out into the kitchen itself. I was once asked if I would hold it back during the entire gallop until the clothes were washed. This was a time when my well-developed, natural awkwardness was at its zenith and so the request was withdrawn. I'm afraid, however, that it was too late for the wash. In Germany they do not just use warm water or hot water, they also cook clothes. Perhaps that was why it was in the kitchen. When I saw the steam coming from this kitchen appliance, I thought it was some kind of large cooking pot and suggested that we might throw in some carrots and potatoes. When the wash was removed it was put into a large plastic dish. Steam rose from the pile and the appearance was that of a stew bubbling in a cauldron in preparation for a large number of guests.

There was a dryer in the basement, but it had hardly been used. The professor owned it, but did not seem too clear about which buttons to push and, admittedly, some of the buttons did cause unusual growling noises. Being a guest in the house and as a traveler having very little to be washed, she offered to dry my clothes in the dryer. There was a lot of knob turning and adjusting, but the machine began working and on its way. When she returned to get the clothes in several hours, so I was told, there were flames coming out of the drier and many of the few very special, selected clothes I had brought were melted or burned to a crisp. We did manage to sort of save my only sweatshirt by scraping it extensively. I knew that washers there cooked, but I had not known until then that driers were ovens which baked. Fortunately, there was a local thrift shop where I was able to obtain some relatively well-fitting clothes at a good price. I had a new slant on the Irish question: Who put the overalls in Ms Murphy's chowder?

The dust patrol. We come now to what is perhaps the number one rule of the house: It is actually not one, but a book of dust rules. It is connected with the rule: nothing hits the floor. If clothing, blankets, towels, etc. touch this floor they must be boiled twice. To understand these rules it might be well to imagine the floor to be one of those seldom cleaned men's lavatories in a large city railway station, the floor being always wet and smelling of urine. We must imagine that because the floor is, in fact, dry, and furthermore if water were to be dropped on the floor it would warp because it is an artificial veneer of wood on some glued particleboard. If a window were left slightly open the floor would warp up looking like long stalks of bamboo. As one walks over the floor one can hear the creaks not of solid wood, but of the veneer which has in places separated already from its underlying particleboard. Normally, of course, we do not think of the floor as a disease. We walk on the floor in socks, or even without shoes. We even lie on the floor sometimes. Some even eat sitting on the floor as if it were a table. We do not normally think that this will cause us to have an emergency hospital visit.

I cannot say that I am entirely clear about this rule-that is, what is supposed to, in fact, really happen if one touches the floor? I only know that the reaction is something like touching the wet, smelly floor in a public city urinal. It may, of course, somehow be connected to the excessive fear of germs (see also the origin of the word "German"). The point is that in this house one must first find out what the rules are. Slippers must be worn. Walking in socks is not recommended, but can be allowed because socks are things close to the floor, yet not directly on the floor. Therefore, never put socks on a bed or chair, etc. after they have been worn. Problems arise as to how one can put on one's socks in the first place without the feet touching the floor. If a sock should fall on the floor it would have to be boiled twice. How is one to get out of the shower without touching the floor? How many times would a foot have to be boiled if it touched the floor? What if a newspaper falls to the floor? Should one then buy a new newspaper, or read the old one at a distance? Suppose one drops a book. Should one throw it away and buy a new one? How do we know the book did not touch the floor or the bookshop? So the rules become quite intricate and complex. It is difficult to know how to handle each new situation or how it will be viewed. On the other hand, it is simple. If you break a known or unknown rule you will be verbally punished. You will know and remember that rule for a long time. You will also learn that you cannot predict the next rule violation-or what you should do about it.

One might imagine that one could just vacuum fairly often and the dust problem would vanish. (The German for vacuum is Staubsauger, literally "dust sucker.") There are two reasons against this possibility. The first is that even if all the dust were gone and not one fine dust particle would ever land again on the floor, the floor would still be a no-woman's land. The floor as floor must be feared. It is, so to speak, in itself evil. One could even imagine it as a swear word: "You floor, you!" It also gives new meaning to the expression, "He was floored."

The second reason is that the professor, for whatever reason, almost never vacuums. On the one occasion which I can remember it happening, a heavy choking smell of must (both an odor and a compulsion) pervaded the house. No, the dust, the most feared object in the world remains to fall everywhere. It, so to speak, makes itself at home and integrates with the milieu.

Now, dust falls on chairs as well as everywhere else whether it is a floor or not. Dust does not care. It has no heart. It responds to a higher being. But it cannot be vacuumed from chairs or radiators or tables, etc. because the vacuum wand has once touched the floor-it is not a magic wand, but an evil wand. It was proposed to obtain therefore a second vacuum cleaner for non-floor objects. In any case, ironically, the dust in this house seems to fall at a faster rate than anywhere else I have been. On one occasion I took great delight in writing her name in the layer of dust on the piano. I began to wonder what the dust rate per hour would be. Perhaps somewhere there are some statistics. At home I have an electronic filter to remove dust that no one can even see. Admittedly, on a really sunny day, with a certain slant of light, one can see thousands of particles of dust in the air which we breathe.

There are large rugs. As is well known, rugs are jungles of microscopic and not so microscopic living creatures. They can live from the crumbs humans continuously drop even by just walking across a room. A large magnification of a rug would show one of the most horrifying, nightmarish worlds imaginable. Creatures which have beaks to saw off legs, arms and necks, and a thousand and one other ways in which to torture one another and cut through things. Bed sheets and pillows, etc. are not unsimilar. But these do not seem to be such special objects of fear as floors. Now in spite of the concern with dust there is no dust mop to be found in the house. To removed dust between the occasional vacuumings, it is done by hand with little pieces of toilet paper. Admittedly, only several tiny areas are cleaned each time this way. I can well understand, of course, that it would be a problem to figure out the rules for shaking out a dust mop.

A certain linguistic source of the fears may be ascertained by examining some German expressions: paß auf sonst staubt's meaning literally "watch out or there will be dust," but meaning colloquially "Watch out or else." That one expression may be one source of the fear. Another is aus dem Staub zu machen meaning literally "get out of the dust, "but meaning colloquially "leave, or hit the breeze."

Now, of course, the above is speculative at best and only, after all, a narrow view regarding the rules of the house. Nevertheless, I can imagine the professor envisioning herself quite ill in a hospital bed, and at the foot of the bed her medical diagnosis reading: Disease: "Dust in the blood. Has nightmares of spots on silverware. Teutonic fever."

The clown gets everything wrong: dress, decorum, logic, speech, movements; yet in this wrongness is a rightness of another sort. (Hyers 1974:55)

(Kant 1990:190)

He doesn't think like I do. He must be crazy!

"Yellow meat and blue potatoes would find few takers." (Benarde 1971:75)

"'What are tarts made of?' 'Pepper, mostly,' said the cook." (Carroll 1960:106)

"'How do I know that this color is red?'-It would be an answer to say, 'I have learnt English.'" (Wittgenstein 1968:#381)

"All this time the Guard was looking at her, first through a telescope, then through a microscope, and then through an opera-glass. At last he said, 'You're traveling the wrong way.'" (Carroll TLG 1960:148)

At the first battle of Marne the French troops were rushed to the front by taxi cab to stop the German invasion.

However, this does not mean that it is acceptable to tell a lie. If a lie is told, one should be able to clearly show that the effect of telling the lie is justifiable. For example a doctor may tell a small lie to save the life of a child. It is not acceptable to lie merely to escape punishment. Some ways of lying are to misuse language, be illogical, use vague words, believe things without evidence, or believe in mythical or mystical things. Examples: "The big lie is more plausible than truth." (Ernest Hemingway) "'The more articulate, the less said,' is an old Chinese proverb which I just made up myself." (Don Herold) I wrote the Encyclopaedia Britannica. The fish was so big that the lake sank two feet when I caught it.

EXAMPLES: It's safe, you can go through Central Park even at four in the morning-if you are a bullet. Q. Now that I have graduated from law school and learned about justice my goal is to make as much money as I possibly can. The man walked down the quiet street, turned the corner and passed away. [Poet:-One who writes metaphors. Philosopher:-One who writes metaphors. Scientist:-One who writes metaphors (also insight humor).] I learned a lot from this exam-how much I didn't know. The philosopher of mathematics is the kind of person who is surprised that 2+2 = 4.

EXAMPLES: "I like Wagner's music better than anybody's. It is so loud that one can talk the whole time without other people hearing what one says." (Oscar Wilde Picture of Dorian Gray )

Escape or Release Humor. (Escape involves allegory, contradiction, defense mechanisms, deviations, false blame, false reason, false statement, fallacies, irony, metaphor, nonsense, pretense, reversal (including provocative therapy), satire, value deviation) (Release involves, in addition, defeated expectation, unexpected honesty, mimic, ridicule, self-deprecation)

A. Avoidance of Truth. This occurs when we change the subject or regard certain subjects as taboo. It is often not regarded as socially acceptable to talk of death, religion, and sex. When such subjects come up they are often too difficult for people to face or be honest about. Religious people, for example, may be afraid their beliefs will be challenged, so they change the subject away from them: "Well it's become rainier than usual weather hasn't it?"

B. Escape from Painful Situations.

C. Escape from Fearful or Negative Emotions. People who live in glass houses "should" make jokes. "Humor saves us from indignation against those who think differently from us on matters about which there ought to be only one opinion, or against those who fail to keep our laws." (K. Wilson 1927:628-633) Humor may help one to avoid becoming angry, indignant, or embarrassed. It allows one to dodge questions, relieve nervous tension, "laugh off" failure. Value deviation and taboo humor allow expression of emotional frustrations. Mental patients escape seriousness. By self-deprecation humor one can release oneself from self-criticism: "Three girls refused to dance with me and I don't blame them."

D. Escape from Reason or Impasse of Thought. Humor is a reaction to or escape from contradictions confronted or situations regarded as improbable or impossible. It is an escape from irrationality and nonsense. It is a kind of defeated expectation, a defeated intelligibility, which results in laughter.

E. Humor Allows Us to Say What Could Not Otherwise Be Said. It is indirect and ambiguous statement. In irony we pretend to say one thing, but say another. In allegory and metaphor we do the same, but possibly clothe it in symbol. With taboo humor we say the unacceptable acceptably. Metaphor and humor both offer escape. Marjorie Boulton (1968, in MB:55) states that metaphors emphasize, clarify, stimulate thought, manifest exuberance, create connections, express what cannot be expressed otherwise. It shades into image and symbol and ranges from seriousness to joke. Michael Osborn (1963, in MB:214) states that metaphor allows us to express what cannot be expressed in ordinary language. Freudians, especially, stress the use of metaphor in therapy. D. Aleksandrowicz (1962, in MB:27) regards metaphor as a method of communicating with the patient, getting at the source of one's problem, and as a method of correcting it. Caruth & Ekstein (1966) similarly state that metaphor may be used to establish communication with schizophrenic patients. They believe it retains the needed distance from facing one's real problems. They hold that a metaphor may even be acted out by the patient, e.g. setting fire to something may be a metaphorical expression of sexual feelings. Wendell Muncie (l937) says that the psychopath shows metaphor disorder and uses it as escape from reality and as autistic gratification. He wrote, "One patient wanted to be an airplane plot in order to get the 'proper perspective on the world.'"

Exaggeration Humor (Allegory, caricature, conceit, defense mechanisms, deviations, blatant lie, metaphor, blatant vice. Compare understatement humor.)

Examples: I tackle the whole backfield and throw out each one until I find the one I want. This car goes five hundred miles an hour in neutral. I'll have your guts for garters. Once upon a time there was a woman with three hundred children. He is so contrary that if you threw him in the river he'd float upstream. (Ozark folk expression) In California, 45 miles per hour is for changing tires. He got up enough lather to shave Kansas City. He had a face like a plate of spaghetti. The soup was so hot his lips, fell in it. It was so realistic there was a bird hopping in his poem. My cows accidentally ate those reducing pills, and shrank to the size of dogs. Of corn whiskey: You can smell the feet of the boys who plowed the corn. In love, no thing is small. (Colette) Shakespeare's Mercutio says to Romeo that his wound is not much as it is not as deep as a well or as wide as a church door.

Expansion of Metaphor Humor (Allegory, exaggeration, take literally, reduce to absurdity, satire)

EXAMPLES:

ANGST

False Blame Humor (Caricature, defense mechanisms, exaggeration, false reasoning, informal logical fallacies, false cause, blatant lie, mimic)

Marcus Aurelius

False Reason Humor (Contradiction, informal logical fallacies, ignorance, improbable, blatant lie, nonsense)

Reasons for events are often relative rather than absolute. Of about half of the diseases listed in the Merck Manual (Updated yearly), the cause is listed as being unknown. When the cause is known, it is often a proximate or immediate cause. The full causes of "thought," perception, and virtually ultimately everything in our environment is fundamentally unknown. About any cause, we can ask for a further cause. It is not completely known why we perform any act. False reason humor is relevant to, exposes, and explores this state of affairs. It brings out the fact that the reasons usually given are often disguised jokes. The false is seen as true, the wrong is seen as right. John Austin states that it is characteristic of excuses to be unacceptable: "We may plead that we trod on the snail inadvertently; but not on a baby-you ought to look where you're putting your great feet." Any statement may be defined in many ways. A car theft may be called a "joy ride." He's not "lazy" that's just "delegative executive ability." Austin asks, "Should we say, are we saying, that he took her money, or that he robbed her? That he knocked a ball into a hole, or that he sank a putt? That he said 'Done,' or that he accepted an offer? How far, that is, are motives, intentions and conventions to be part of the description of actions? And more especially here, what is an or one or the action?" (26) Excuses are also false reasons. Excuses are reasons given for attempting to free oneself from guilt or blame. As insight humor, false blame may be answered by false reasons. EXAMPLES: Q. Why did you climb the mountain? A. Because it was there. Q. Why did you go to college? A. I didn't have anything else to do. It is very warm in here. I'll have to take off my ring. Q. Why did you steal the money? A. I couldn't help myself. Q. Why are you here? A. I'm just floating around. Q. Why did you marry? A. I just felt like it. Q. Why did you break the window? A. Because I'm a teenager. It's good because it's there. He couldn't call her because he was just stuck in neutral. After purposely spilling milk: "Well, who's perfect anyway?" Death: it's a family tradition. It must be true if it came to you in a dream.

False Statement Humor (Synthetic contradiction, exaggeration, false blame, false reason, informal logical fallacies, ignorance, blatant lie, deviation from truth, obvious lie, nonsense)

An elaborate put-on or manufacturing a false statement whether blatantly made or not: "New York is the capital of Japan." The false is presented as if it were true. The humor derives from the contradiction. Carpenter (1925) stated that humor involves falsehood and the pleasure of being fooled. Anything presenting a great enough falsehood that is suddenly perceived as such by an effort of judgment is comic. Thus, religions and myths must be taken seriously so as not to be merely humorous or ridiculous. EXAMPLES: That's right, our chickens hibernate each winter in the pond. We made some water balls. In my previous life I was an elephant. He has no emotions.

Free Association Humor (Ambiguity, connotation, deviations, expand metaphor, informal logical fallacies (irrelevance), metaphor, metonymy, misclassification, nonsense)

Hopelessness Humor (Contradiction, defense mechanisms, escape, impossible, nonsense, paradox, reduce to absurdity, riddle, useless)

EXAMPLES:

Hypocrisy Exposed Humor (Allegory, contradiction, deviation, defense mechanisms, unexpected honesty, informal logical fallacies, insight, lying, pretense, reduce to absurdity, ridicule, satire, value deviation)

A gentleman's agreement is an arrangement which is not an agreement, between two persons neither of whom is a gentleman, with each expecting the other to be strictly bound while he himself has no intention of being bound at all.

EXAMPLES: "You ought never to do wrong when people are looking." (Mark Twain) To sell your body for money is bad, but to sell it for marriage is a virtue. "When a man comes to me for advice, I find out the kind of advice he wants and I give it to him." (Josh Billings) "The English public takes no interest in a work of art until it is told that the work in question is immoral." (Oscar Wilde) "Everyone can master a grief but he that has it" (Shakespeare, Much Ado About Nothing 3.2.28) Our superstitions are better than yours. "It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends on his not understanding it." (Upton Sinclair) Confucius: "I have never yet seen a man who loves virtue as much as he loves beautiful women." Being good, but pretending to be bad. "As philosophy grows more abstract we think increasingly by means of metaphors that we profess not to be relying on." (I. A. Richards, in MB:240) Politician: "I'll be happy to answer your questions." "There is a lot of defensive rhetoric and antiscientific obfuscation encrusted like old paint on the presentation of current ideas in linguistics." (Pullum 1991:5) "Most of the results of mathematical linguistics…have…become empirically virtually or completely empty." (Pullum 1991:52) A Christian scientist ("weekday scientist") is a form of hypocrisy.

Ignorance Humor (Defense mechanisms, deviations, false blame, false cause, expose hypocrisy, take literally, logical fallacies, mistake, reduce to absurdity, ridicule, religious humor, self-deprecation, wrong use)

Too close to this type of humor is ridicule. Ridicule is to laugh at ignorance, and is put-down and rejection. But, as was shown earlier, ridicule is not humor. It involves negative emotion and seriousness. It is therefore not a type of humor. Ridicule belongs to negative emotions such as anger and revenge. Ignorance humor may be kind, and involve no ridicule. Davies (Bennett 1991:215-235) said about "fooltowns" which are the butt of deprecation jokes, that we like such jokes whether or not we are sympathetic. Irish, Polish and moron jokes are also discussed as a social phenomenon by Davies (Durant & Miller 1988:44-65) We may laugh with, rather than laugh at. Ignorance humor is especially useful in criticism because it exposes faulty thinking. Virtually all types of humor expose faulty thinking as well. EXAMPLES: Things not to say to an arresting traffic officer: 1. You are a lot nicer than the other two officers who gave me a warning. 2. You are not going to check the trunk, are you? 3. Wow, you must have been going over 120 mph to have caught me.

Impossible Humor (contradiction, false blame, false reason, false statement), hopeless, ignorance, blatant lie, nonsense, paradox, reduce to absurdity, useless)

Improbable Humor (inconsistency and synthetic contradiction, deviation from the usual, exaggeration, defeated expectation, understate) The unlikely is presented as if it were likely. EXAMPLES: Teach a dog tricks by telephone. If you bet on horses you will make thousands. If we put another ten dollars on the sweepstakes, we are very likely to win.

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or continue to next chapter. (Chapter 7c continuing Analysis